Confidence is a tricky subject. There are some who seem to naturally have it at all times, and yet we can often see this thin dividing line between self-assurance and arrogance when viewing this from a distance. When we feel confident, we might delve into habits that we do not usually take. Selfies, for example, are often an expression of how confident we feel that day, or how self-accepting we are (filter or no filter).
For some reason, however, confidence can feel like something we should feel guilty to have. We often judge others thusly to the point that it can be hard to forgo thinking about our own flaws. For example, if we are slightly overweight, we might think this is unacceptable and completely stay inside for the summer, despite all the fun we are missing out on.
We are here to ask you one simple question – why should you ask permission to be confident? There are many out there with negative intentions and less than worthwhile personality traits that have no problem with it, so why should you? Also, who would you ask for that permission if not yourself?
Here we are met with a problem. In the following advice, we hope you can find your confidence without being so cautious about it:
Who Would You Ask For Permission?
Let’s unpack this further. When you externalize your confidence in any capacity, you are always reliant on something that is unpredictable. It might be if you’re having a good hair day if your skin has been co-operative with you that day by not blemishing at all, or how much money you have in your bank account. But are you those things? Do you base your entire personality on these things? No? Well, then why base your confidence on it? When you try to find that you have natural inner confidence no matter what and let that show, then you can stop relying on other people to validate you.
Worrying About Others
Let us say that someone insults you, from top to bottom. They disparage your appearance, the way you walk, your work ethic, your scent, everything about you. Should you take stock in this? Of course, it might take you off guard, but should you take it to heart? Well, even a small inspection of this person would help you find flaws also. Despite their lack of courteous manners, you might find a range of things you do not like about the other person in return. This harms their holier-than-thou approach, however, worrying about others can only lead you to get involved in this terrible shouting match with no victor. It is much better to smile and brush this off and let that negative energy fall off your shoulder. This is the essence of true, wise confidence.
Having Fun For Yourself
Confidence is not worrying about how perfect you look that day. It’s enjoying expressing yourself in those short shorts from Planet Blue, getting that tattoo with a friend to commit to your long term friendship, strutting your stuff on the beach, exploring your local city, being creative, and having fun. In this way you honor yourself, and confidence rarely becomes something you struggle with as a result. Instead, you will be actualized.
With this advice, you are sure to gain the confidence you deserve.